the numbers game

with no prospects in the horizon, decided to tweak my JDate profile a little bit. we’ll see if anything happens with that, but related to that-and online dating-there was something on my mind…that I had also heard others talking about too…

Unlike most online dating profiles, JDate does have a spot where you can list your weight. I have always decided to plead the fifth on that. First off-it’s really no one’s business what my exact weight is (and can always change based on things like time of month, etc…)

But moreso…it seems like guys are so hung up on the numbers-they expect girls to be super skinny, won’t date someone above a certain weight or BMI…and honestly, considering I am probably 10-15 pounds heavier than what guys consider acceptable for my height (not due to laziness though-just bad genes)…I am sorta afraid that the number would be a turnoff. Instead, I hope the fact that I mention an active lifestyle (e.g., marathon running)-and that I have halfway decent pictures-would make up for that. Or does it?

Yeah I know. If a guy would judge me based on a number, I wouldn’t want to be with him anyway. But guys, please convince me you’re not all like that.


13 thoughts on “the numbers game

  1. i think you’re putting too much thought into it. just do what makes you feel comfortable. personally, i don’t think listing a number is going to make any quality guys any more or less interested in checking you out. sounds like you’re a bit aprehensive about plugging in a weight number, so perhaps you don’t? again, dating is stressful enough – no need to overthink it and put more pressure on yourself.

  2. yeah, i guess i really didnt think about it til recently. and i guess my thought was, im damned if i do (if the number is too high) and im damned if i dont (if i dont put a number, what am i trying to hide?)i wouldnt even feel comfortable putting in a fake number…i don’t wanna be one of those πŸ™‚

  3. I don’t really feel like I can evaluate your odds without seeing your profile. So . . .

  4. you’re taken anyways!!! πŸ™‚

  5. I don’t think I’ve ever used a site that asked for my weight, but at the point when I decided to stop agonizing about my body and start embracing my curves, I put in my profile that I am an “unapologetic size 8-10.” And I got a response from and went on a date with a guy who told me he thought that showed confidence, and he found that attractive. (He eventually got back together with some old flame of his, which is another story for another day.)

  6. Well, really body fat percentage is more important than actual weight. But few people actually know that percentage … I’d guess yours is pretty low, tho, given how much you run and how fit & trim you looked at the Flyer gala. (You should put up more photos of you in that strapless dress! You looked great!)

  7. i honestly dont know what my % is-i did get it measured a coupla years ago and it was higher than expected but who knows how accurate it was…thanks for the compliment-im surprised i looked halfway decent, considering i did next to no running in january due to my injury πŸ™‚

  8. Surprised??? Really?? Are you just being MODEST Flygirl? C’mon you know you are v. attractive. I wanna link to that full-on photo of you at the awards party with your nice skinny upper arms showing (hot!), but it also has your nametag in there. Anyway, weren’t you doing all kinds of spinning stuff in January instead of running?

  9. Your blog has been an inspiration. Keep it up and don’t fret over what you think you should weigh. You are super cute and in top shape.

  10. thanks for the flattery, guys :)moving on though!

  11. this guy likes girls “quite buxom”. See, not everyone is looking for “super skinny [girls] above a certain weight or BMI”.

  12. What I think is funny is that guys often have a really skewed misconception of what a certain weight looks like. I once dated a guy who said he liked girls 110 and under. He thought I fit into that range, though I’m actually 15-20 pounds higher. So I’d be reluctant to post my weight just because some guys might think I didn’t fit their definition of “in shape” even though I’m fairly fit. My guess is you’re the same.

  13. yep Laura…that is *exactly* the point I was making too πŸ™‚

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