games people play

so last nite at a certain b-day shindig, several of my faithful readers were asking about what I mentioned in this post (no more talking about potential guys.) Here was the situation. Girl meets guy at a bar during a girls nite out. Girl and guy get together a coupla days later and really hit it off, girl feels serious chemistry there. Girl and guy see each other a second time a couple of weeks later, again have another great night-or so girl thinks. Guy leaves it that he does want to see girl again and that he’d be in touch. And it is now almost 2 weeks later. so…yeah.

Part of me wants to just let it go and say “his loss.” But the other part of me wants to find out what I did wrong. So ya know, the next time I meet a guy that I’m really into, I don’t make the same mistake again…

Between date 1 and 2, when I was unsure of whether the guy was into me or not…I was talking to my coworker EB, and mentioned that I’m sick of this guessing game, that it never used to be like this and she said “oh yes, dating is completely different now than it was years ago.” Now it’s this guessing game, guys can show some interest, but not too much, can’t seem too eager, etc…

Not that I can completely blame guys, I can’t say we, as women, are much better. We’re told “don’t call, don’t email, don’t text message, don’t make the first move, don’t show too much interest, you’ll look too desperate and needy.” We’re supposed to use “He’s Just Not That Into You” as our dating bible. (Great dating world we live in now…neither side can show interest! talk about lack of communication…)

But part of it is that I think I was really spoiled by the Ex-Boyfriend, oh yes I was. No game-playing there, he made his sincere interest in me known, even before we were officially an “item.” The meeting up between classes because he wanted to see me, the phone conversations, the late-night AIM chats, the several postcards from spring break, hell-just thinking of me so much that he called me on spring break. (Not that I hold all other guys to this standard, believe me I don’t, but still…)

And I think part of me wants to be that innocent college senior again. When dating and “courting” seemed to be much more simple, with much less games.

(Yeah, I know, I really need to stop thinking about this stuff. At least it keeps my mind off of tomorrow’s race…)

now playing: “wait a minute” ~ pussycat dolls ft. timberland

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5 thoughts on “games people play

  1. Why don YOU give him a call… show him that YOU are interested in him… maybe, just maybe he is insecure and he did not read you well. Good luck.

  2. Completely off topic comment (though for the record, guys completely suck- I have been right there so many times!!!).. thanks for your good luck wishes! Your amazing sub-4:00 debut seems even more amazing to me now!

  3. qunito sol-um…oh believe me, when we got together, i made it clear that i was interested. yeah, maybe if it were a week or so ago, i could have given a quick call/email, but since 2 weeks have passed, it’s sort of a moot point…i’m not really interested in pursuing anything anymore, only to find out what the hell happened…kate-you’re very welcome, and great job on your marathon debut!!

  4. I’ve said this before, but why do you think the “problem” is you, or that you “did” something wrong? Just because someone isn’t ultimately into you doesn’t mean YOU are the problem

  5. Why did I think it was me? I dunno…guess because I felt like he did such a 180…that night, he was acting completely into me, but then he didn’t want to see me again? Makes no sense, if you ask me…

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