i called this one a mile away

just a couple days ago, i received an email from the guy i went out with over july 4th weekend…pretty much apologizing for not calling (though i had thought it was obvious that a second date…or even a future…was not in the cards…) and among the reasons for not calling (in addition to the age difference and just being completely different people…)

and maybe because I am not a runner and I think you really want to identify with someone who runs…..


(i really, really tried to keep the running talk to a minimum, i swear!! i know not everyone finds talk about goal races and long runs as interesting as i do :-p )

not to beat a dead horse here-but i am very envious of all those runner-runner couples (or could be runner-triathlete, same difference)…be it all the Flyer-Flyer couples, or Flyer-other running club, or even 2 unaffiliated runners. bottom line is, they “get” each other. they understand why you need to get up before 6 a.m. to sneak in a workout before it gets too warm, or why you plan trips around certain races, or they even just cross the finish line hand-in-hand. and understand why your fellow running club-mates are not simply “the road runners”-they’re actually a bunch of very cool people and your friends.

so yeah. nothing that has not already been said before. just found it funny that this one seemed to think what i was thinking a few weeks back.

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13 thoughts on “i called this one a mile away

  1. Couldn’t agree more. I much prefer dating active guys (even if they’re not runners). It’s like any number of things that can be central to a person — religion, education, politics, being healthy, whatever — in that you have to find someone whose core values, and the way they manifest themselves, fit with your own. Running, just like any other sport, is fundamentally an expression of a lifestyle decision. Of course, once you’ve found a match there, finding someone who isn’t bored by talk of intervals and long runs is just icing on the cake. πŸ™‚

  2. I’ve thought (hoped?) it’s just be a matter of meeting someone as passionate and/or committed to one activity or hobby. You might not understand the details of the other’s thing, but you relate on the basic level of dedication.Also, it might not be much consolation, but at least you’re getting e-mails with apologies and explaining why it didn’t work out. That’s better than never hearing from them again.

  3. Yeah, I was just as shocked to find out that not everyone finds talk about goal races and long runs as interesting as us runners do.Then again, I married a non-runner, but things are working out in spite of this.

  4. Weird that he chose to email an apology now…after you’d pretty much already written him off! I’ve only ever dated one other runner, and I can’t say that worked out any better than the non-runners, lol. But I agree with Jay that as long as the person is passionate about something, it could work…as long as they’re supportive of your healthy lifestyle and occasional need for an early night before races, etc!

  5. well, i didn’t really write this one off. it was sorta uncertain how it was left. the email was pretty much because he felt i deserved an explanation. and i gave him a nice explanation back and actually just received a nice reply back today-he took my email with no hard feelings. hmmm. maybe some good karma will come out of that one. :)and as far as getting emails…it’s always the ones i want to hear from, that i never hear from again. or until i run into them randomly or something like that ;)and for those of you who married/are dating non-runners…how do you make it work? just out of my own curiosity…could maybe help in the future…

  6. I totally agree with this post! I don’t think it necessarily means they have to be a runner but that they need to have something that they are passionate about to be able to understand your passion for running. I was talking to a friend about this the other day actually. I tend to wonder if the reason a lot of relationships don’t work is because people have never found something to attach themselves to…to be passionate about. Just food for thought.

  7. I think running clubs should be re-named runaholics anonymous =) My wife doesn’t get the whole running craze, and certainly doesn’t encourage my over indulgence with running but she hesitantly supports me. I have found a balance between running & family, part of the balance is to make sure my wife has time for her endeavors!

  8. I’ve gotta agree with Ryan here. I am married to a non runner. She’s supportive and respects what I am doing but when I make a decision to run a marathon I take the training time commitment into consideration and discuss it with her.Relationships are not easy. Like a marathon they take time, commitment and hard work. Also like running, the joy is in the running not the finishing.

  9. I checked out runningsingles.com a while ago and was underwhelmed.

  10. derek-maybe you misunderstood my post…i only said i was envious of the runner-runner couples-not that i was limiting myself to runners. it would be an ideal combination, yes. and if there is a man out there that wouldnt give me a hard time if i have to be on the wagon the night before a goal race, or if i can’t stay in bed at 6am because i need to sneak in a few miles before work, or that i cant lounge on the couch on a sunday because i have to do a long run…well, thats great too. it’s more compatibility than anything else… (and besides, i seem to remember a certain mention on your blog, how you seem to have no trouble meeting people on the run in the park πŸ˜‰ why can’t i? do the runner guys only go for the fast chicks? inquiring minds wanna know πŸ˜‰ )as for that site, oh yeah, i know all about it, my MAL inbox gets spammed with emails about it daily. i gave it a look and agree with jbl’s assessment :)and i told you i was tough and stubborn months ago πŸ˜‰ (though dont put any worth into what that guy was saying…he was a creep!)

  11. I think I’ve met a grand total of four girls running in the park. One was our mutual friend M., whom I dated for about six weeks. The rest just lasted a single date — although curiously I wanted a second one with all of them. (Two said they had met someone else, the third wanted a Jewish guy).

  12. **sigh**…to meet a “runner guy” would be most awesome…

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