i’ve been accused of many things in my life, but i can’t say being overly confident is one of them.
but this week, that’s how i was feeling about my training. for probably the first time since getting injured, i felt like i was in a good place with my running, the speed was coming back, i was pain-free, i had some decent races this spring, and a fun marathon training cycle to look forward to.
and of course when I start feeling confident about something, you can count on something to quickly bring me back to reality. that thing of course, being work.
there’s a project i am on that is going to require some travel in…you guessed it. september, october, november. just the time when i have to be racking up the miles. dammit!!!!!!!!!
yeah, it’s only gonna be 2-3 days out of a workweek. but it’s going to be several of those weeks. (Good thing I really don’t have a life!) And it will most likely be the beginning of the week, so that means missing Tuesday speedwork…and after I worked so hard these past few months to gain back a little bit of speed. And I’m sure cramming 40 miles into 3 consecutive days is not the best thing to do either…ugh, I really did not want to do this training half-assed. If there is going to be any walking during the marathon, I’d want it to be because I pushed myself to the limit, not due to being ill-prepared.
Look, I know you gotta do what you gotta do to get the job done. (And if this project was at the very least…interesting and fulfilling…maybe I wouldn’t be as upset. Not to mention the people who used to do the travel portion, were retirees/students/other people who didn’t have jobs, who didn’t have as much of a packed schedule.) But don’t I have the right to a personal life, personal goals? I guess not.
Basically, I was this close to tears after hearing about it. Did I make a mistake in ’04 by deciding to concentrate on shorter distances-why didn’t I take advantage of the opportunity when I had it? Did I make a mistake last year by not training through my injury while I actually had the time to really train?
i don’t know. i’m crossing my fingers and hoping for the best, but expecting the worst-that I am going to have to either put this marathon off until ’07, or do it severely undertrained.
you can guess i was fired up on my run tonite-i did the 6-mile Central Park loop at an 8:22 pace-which was faster than I had any right or reason going for an easy run.
thank god for happy hour tomorrow nite…boy, I am going to need to drink a LOT.
now playing: “so under pressure” ~ dannii minogue