if the “eFlash” emails I receive from NYRR weren’t enough, I got hardcopy reminder in the mail yesterday…the deadline to apply for guaranteed entry to the ’06 NYC marathon is approaching fast. I said originally, “oh yeah, I’ll wait to see how I do in Queens first…”
I don’t know why I am so apprehensive about this. I mean, I do want to do this, the one piece of unfinished business in my running life. Then there’s the part of me that’s afraid of deja vu from last year. And the part of me that feels like I wouldn’t have the support I may have had 1 or 2 years ago. Mainly from my family, I guess.
The comments I got when I had to throw in the towel for ’05:
“You didn’t really think you could run 26 miles, did you?”
(ummm…maybe at that time i couldn’t, but would have been nice if you thought that with the proper training, I could have done it.)
“Are you gonna try for the marathon again, or have you pretty much given up?”
(why do you consider giving up even an option? because I wussed out last year?)
And the family seems more excited and supportive about my cousin running a 10k than anything I do. I know in the grand scheme of things, my times I’m running now aren’t all that bad, but I can’t deny it hurts a little that once the PR’s, the faster times and the hardware went away, so did the cheers and support. And it’d be hard to make it through marathon training without that.
I dunno. Got 2 more weeks to make a decision.
On the topic of marathons, I spent a better part of Monday tracking my teammates that were running the Boston Marathon. I thought I’d feel nothing but envy for those who did have the honor of running…as they are in a completely different class of runner that I am, the class that I’d love to be someday…but surprisingly not. With every 5K mat that they stepped over, I felt myself as wrapped up in their races as they were. 3 of our speedy guys had very strong first halfs (2 on pace for sub-3!) and to see their races slip away in the second half…it completely broke my heart to see. (especially one of them that was putting in 100-mile weeks, 27-mile long runs…I so wanted him to get the race he wanted and truly deserved.) I was sending cheering and healing vibes from afar, hoping that somehow, they’d feel it and having that support could inspire them to pick it up a little and finish strong. A couple of my other teammates did PR, which I was glad to see (especially one who was injured early last year and kinda went through the same struggles that I’m experiencing, trying to get back to where she used to be.)
What did we ever do before the tracking feature was introduced for these big marathons? It’s a neat feature that really does make you feel like you’re part of the day, no matter how far away you may be.