thing #256 that i hate about dating

okay, despite what the title may hint at, this post is not going to be solely devoted to bitching about the single life.  i just kinda liked the post title

so actually, this is a writeup about NYRR Club Night.  which as you all may know, is one of my favorite events, this being the 5th time I attended.  I’m always up for meeting others in the running community, and at an event like this, the atmosphere is actually a little more relaxed (unlike at a race where everyone’s out to get each other )  Like last year’s event, it was held at the Hard Rock Cafe, but this time they were bringing back the post-awards ceremony dancing!   I was glad, I felt that was a better way for the clubs to mingle.  As I had mentioned last year-I felt the cocktail hour was more “find your teammates so you can sit together during the awards” than a chance to mingle with the other teams.  So thumbs up to NYRR for listening to our feedback!!

So contrary to what I just said, ther was actually some minor mingling going on during the cocktail hour/pre-awards.  I was hanging out with the other Flyers who attended, but I was able to say hi/catch up with friends from other teams too…while ever so often, looking at the flat screen TVs that showed a slideshow from the 2009 races to see if we could spot any Flyers (Lam-you were spotted!)

So…time for the awards ceremony.  As our men moved up to the “A” division in 2009, no award for them this year.  Our 50+/veteran women won 3rd place in their division…congrats ladies, I am sure you gals will be #1 in 2010!   And of course, watched all the individual age-group winners get their awards…as I helped with the awards process this year, not a lot of it was surprising to me   The ceremony ended with a pictorial “decade in review”…ahhh brought back memories.  And a couple of us came away with this with ideas to improve our own team’s awards…

Anyway, most of the other Flyers left right after the awards ceremony, but EF and SD stuck around…not surprising, they are the dancing king and queen of the Flyers   And let me tell you…I was definitely glad to have them around.  Here is the part that has some relevance to this post title.  I do go to these events with an open mind…not with the expectation that I will meet someone, but “you never know.”  But let me say, it is just disturbing how aggressive and “grabby” a few of the men were.  And that anyone considers it to be appropriate behavior.  And this isn’t the first time I’ve dealt with it…I remember a Jewish singles event where the same thing happened.  But I’ll tell you, this is one thing I truly hate about being single.  I mean, I don’t think I was “asking for it”, I wasn’t dressed overly slutty (if anything, I probably am more covered up than when I am running!)…it sorta ruined what should have been my favorite part of the evening.  I mean seriously…if someone’s body language signals that not interested, feeling uncomfortable…just stop it for godssakes!!

The music was good, but I kept having to excuse myself…to either say I needed to talk to someone, or get another drink…was actually a little bit of a relief when the night was over.  And guys-I know you are all not like that.  hell, one of my teammates met her boyfriend at Club Night a few years back and they are still together now.  I just seem to be a magnet for the wrong guys I guess.  Next year, if I don’t have a boyfriend, I will need to bring a bodyguard or something…

Oh, and can you believe it, the NYRR photographer actually caught me in action on the dance floor…

let’s play a love game, play a love game

it’s complicated and stupid
got my ass squeezed by sexy cupid
guess he wants to play, wants to play
a love game, a love game

(who knows, maybe Lady GaGa knows what she’s talking/singing about…)  I would be lying if I didn’t say I was happy that today is February 15th.  Meaning the most dreaded day of the year (and indeed complicated and stupid)  is behind me again…until next year.  And every year I say “next year will be different”…never is.   Of course, the everso lovely Facebook didn’t exactly help matters much, as the theme of the week was “change your profile picture to one of you and your significant other and tell how you got together.”  Or as one of my friends put it “Remind all your single friends how alone they are by showing us how happy and in love you all are in your profile pic…”  Yeah, thanks SO much, Facebook!!

I think I really started to hate Valentine’s Day back in 2001, when the Ex-Boyfriend emailed me on that day, and in the process was sorta bragging about how great things were for him-at a time where things were not going well for me. (like jeez, great timing…)  It takes a lot to make me cry at work…well congrats to him, he achieved that.  And I guess ever since then I’ve been reminded of that.  And for the record, I could care less about receiving actual gifts on February 14th.  Flowers eventually die.  Candy will just make me fat.  All I want is companionship…is that honestly too much to ask?  I know its hard to achieve…but can’t a girl believe?

So instead of sitting at home with a bottle of wine or going to some meet-market type Jewish singles event, I just went around the corner to my fave Mexican place and had a coupla margaritas while sitting at the bar and watching the Olympics.  Not exactly the ideal way to spend the evening, but I just didn’t feel like being alone at home.  And there was indeed a Jewish singles event that night but I really wasn’t up for it.  Oh, and I discovered that I really need to be banned from drunk texting and/or emailing on February 14th.  Think I need a breathalyzer for the CrackBerry…or something like Gmail’s “Mail Goggles” feature.  Anyway, sorry about that, “certain person.”

Anyway, different topic…oh yeah, the Olympics.  Can’t say I am as emotionally invested in these games as I am for the Summer games, but still nice to watch.  And gotta love NBC and their spotty and/or tape-delayed coverage once again!  (Did they not learn anything from Beijing 2008?)  And poor Canada…between the techincal malfunction in the opening ceremonies and the not-so-winter-like weather…they’ve got their work cut out for them for the remainder of these games.

And speaking of winter weather, can Vancouver please take all the snow that we’re getting here in NY?  Seriously, they need it, we don’t want it-there, perfect solution.  I mean yeah, it was nice to have a shortened work day last Wednesday (our office closed early that day due to the weather) but enough is enough already…can you all tell that I’m not a winter person?

And thanks to everyone who voted in my poll and commented on my last post…I’m pretty sure I know what I am gonna do but I’ll just leave you all in suspense a little while longer

winter is long

So yeah, here is that ”longer blog post” I referred to in yesterday’s “welcome to my new blog crib” post   And rumor has it there may be other bloggy peeps looking to make a blog software switcharoo and join me here…ahhh once again, I am a trendsetter

So first off, how about those Jets?  Wasn’t sure how their chances would be yesterday, as I’m sure the Bengals gave them last Sunday’s game just so they could choose their first-round opponent, so to say.  And there was some sloppy playing yesterday, but it all came together in the end.  (And I just also have to mention that Mark Sanchez is good eye candy )  So they take on San Diego next week…can they repeat the magic?

And now that the new year has started…yeah winter really seems long…everything seems long(er).  Last week was the first 5-day week I worked in awhile and it just killed me   Well not really.  Though of course, the week cannot pass by without incident…well, besides being in an all-day training session for an online reporting tool and feeling so unproductive for one day, there’s a quasi-crisis on one project (thankfully was not my fault, and did not get fingers unfairly pointed at me!) and then I had to save someone else’s ass, who doesn’t follow directions when being told “re-map yourself to the new shared drive and don’t use the old one.”  Friday couldn’t come soon enough…

And on that running thang, I got my new orthotics in and have started breaking ‘em in…not sure if they are drastically different from my old ones, but they do feel good and seem to be better made.  And my PT is starting to kick my ass-literally-with squats and lunges…I think I am gonna have a chronically sore butt for the next few weeks

And a topic that I’ve mentioned briefly before, but just feel like raising the question again…what is the etiquette on family members being friends/keeping in touch with ex-boyfriends?  Like do I have any reason to feel bothered by the fact that my ex-boyfriend (who I havent spoken to in forever) is Facebook friends with my brother and I see him posting comments on my brother’s status?  (I give it 2 weeks before he friends both my parents…)  Never the mind that for 2 years after I broke up, my mom still had a picture of the 2 of us in her office…and would probably still have it there today had I not seen it that one time… :-\

The weather is supposed to get into the 30s this week!!  Break out the running shorts…

a devil of a decade

Well first off, this is post #666 for me.  Hence the devil reference in the post title   No, I’m not saying I’m the devil…hahahaha.

So I’m watching “I Love the New Millennium” on VH1 right now…2000 was previously on, now this hour showcases 2001.  (Update since I started writing-now it’s on 2003!  Boy this post took a long time to write…)  Holy shit-are we really on the edge of a new decade?  Was it really 10 years ago that we were all freaking out about the Y2K bug and thinking the world will come to an end on January 1, 2000?   (funniest memory from that-my dad “stocking up” on 5 gallons of bottled water since apparently the Y2K bug would cause a lack of drinking water…oh the things people believed!)

Man-so much has happened this decade…if I thought 2009 was an emotional rollercoaster of sorts…well the whole decade was like the Great American Scream Machine or something like that   And since VH1 is looking back…I kinda feel like doing the same.

2000-my biggest memory of this year was breaking up with my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years…which as a lot of you long-time readers know, was someone everyone expected me to marry.  But no matter how great someone may be on paper, if you grow apart and become different people during that time…staying togehter for the sake of others can never result in anything good.  So for the first time in 5 years, I was single and it was really tough…partially because most of my friends were in relationships, but also partially because I was still living at home…

2001-fell in love, only to wind up getting played.  Moved on out of the parentals house and into the city.  9/11.  Seeing how the fallout from that brought out the good in people, but also brought out the bad in other people.  We were in a changed world, no matter how you looked at it.

2002-I think this year was officially the low point of the decade for me.  Still hurting from said 2001 player.  Dealt with some cash flow issues.  A friend of my brother…well, I will not go into detail about what he tried to do to me, but let’s just say as a result of it, my brother terminated that friendship immediately.  Not one, but two roommate changes-and anyone in NYC knows how stressful it is finding a roommate!  Got laid off from my job…but thankfully I did find a new one and was only unemployed for 6 weeks.

2003-anyone else remember the blackout?  the day of my baby brother’s b-day no less…original plan was to head to NJ for a b-day dinner right after work, instead we spent it grabbing beers from some of the 3rd Ave bars and him crashing at my place.  And thanking my lucky stars that I was still living in midtown then instead of uptown…yep, 2 weeks later I had moved into my little studio apartment on the UWS.  Can’t tell you how good it felt to not have to deal with roommates.

2004-the running year, so to say.  Joined NYRR, joined the Flyers, opened up a whole new world for me.  Maybe this year was a turning point of sorts?

2005-learned and appreciated how tough it is to plan social events in NYC, thanks to my stint as Flyers’ social chair   Was hoping to run my first marathon-NYC-this year, but a month into the training, a bad case of plantar fasciitis stopped me in my tracks, so to say.  And believe me, recovery was a bitch and then some   And oh yeah…I discovered this little thing called blogging and thought I’d try it

2006-busy year, I remember.  Had a Flyers exec board position-Member at Large.  And let me tell you, it really made me feel good that my teammates felt I was the best one for the job.  What a difference from 10 years before-when I kept getting shot down for positions on my sorority’s exec board…i was too new, i was too shy, whatever, there was some excuse.  Met a lot more people in the running community…partially through this blogging thang and partially because one of my goals as MAL was to enhance relations between us and other clubs…with “mixer” happy hours, post-race softball games and other things.  Hit the big 3-0 this year…yikes Work kicked me in the ass this year, partially due to one project from hell, partially because we were down one man and it took over a year to find a replacement!  But despite all that, I did finally run my first marathon…and broke 4 hours

2007-I think I was mentally in hibernation for a good portion of the first half of the year…yeah, work was still kicking me in the ass.  Just seemed to affect everything…my relationships, my running, as well as other things.   Things did get a little better through the spring and summer though.  Took my first real vacation in a very long time-to San Francisco…ran a half-marathon there and totally fell in love with the city…hmmm, could I maybe see myself living there someday, who knows.  (Or maybe I really needed a vacation and anything would have seemed good!)  Had my first serious relationship in years…which didn’t end on the best of terms.  Learned 2 things-a significant other must respect my friends and if I need my space after said breakup, that needs to be respected too if there is to be any chance at a friendship.

2008-is it me or did this seem like the year of Facebook?  Almost every day, a new friend request, quiz invite and my personal favorite-the “SuperPoke”   Halfway through the year, got a taste of what the state of the economy would be as we were told at work that “2008 is turning into a very tough year” and that certain big events would be canceled in order to make budget, that we’d have to do without some “nice to haves”.  Running-wise, 2008 started off with a calf injury, I recovered from it and it did turn out to be my best running year in 4 years…ran 3:44 in NYCM and got goals in shorter distances that I had been chasing after for years.

2009-And so it brings us to this year.  Early months were kinda rough…close relative (my uncle) passed away…round of layoffs at work which thankfully I dodged that bullet, but me and others wound up absorbing a lot more work as a result…but at that point, just grateful to have a job.  Was vice president of the Flyers this year. The Yankees won their first World Series in 9 years!! Running-wise, was on track to have my best year yet…and it looked like not only was a BQ marathon in reach, but 3:40 was setting the bar too low.  But was stopped in my tracks at mile 21 of the Marine Corps Marathon with the infamous (sh)IT band injury.  As I said before, I am happy for the good running moments, just wish the year hadn’t ended on such a bad note.  Was in 2 serious relationships this year…and I am grateful to still be friends with both of them.  Especially the latter…us getting together did cause me to lose a friend, but I feel I got a much better one as a result.  I never thought I’d be able to just hang out with an ex over a few beers and just enjoy ourselves…but we can and we do…someone I’m very happy to have had in my life this year…and in future years too

So I’m reading over this now and thinking wow…can’t believe how much has happened in 10 years.  Even though I have said 2009 was a rough year, I will say that at the very least, this decade did end better than it started.  And have I learned anything?  Well I guess so…

Work-I felt like i worked away my 20s and don’t want to do the same with my 30s…in my early years I put in the time because I thought it would get me more money, more power…yeah, at the time I did actually like my job…but by the end of the decade I learned that all the money in the world isn’t worth it if you’re not happy, don’t feel fulfilled, don’t feel like there is a good work-life balance.  Oh yeah-and getting involved with someone at work is definitely NOT the best idea!!

Love/relationships-and on that topic…well in the beginning of the decade, with a lot of my friends having the marriage bug, I kinda wanted the same…and I know I’ve felt like that for many years too.  But I’ve been thinking about this for a good part of this year.  First off, as I have mentioned before, I really don’t like dating.  It’s more…I feel like I’m putting on an act of sorts and it just gets exhausting.  I just want to be myself…and that was a sign that my last relationship was gonna have great potential, as I never once felt like I had to act, I could totally be myself.  And I honestly don’t care that people tell me that “dating means free dinner and drinks” or something to that effect.  Seriously, I will gladly pay for my own damn dinner and drinks if it means I’m with a guy I can feel comfortable with and be myself with and enjoy myself with.  And I know I’ve said plenty of times before that I want to get married but…well as James Marsden’s character said to Katherine Heigl’s character in 27 Dresses: “I think you want a wedding-not a marriage.”  I guess now I’m feeling the opposite…like it’s more the companionship I’m seeking out instead of the shiny rings and wedding.  I do have friends who are in permanently committed relationships but havent felt the need to get married…and they are just as happy as those who have “made it official.”  Maybe I’m not making sense here…but this is always a complex topic.

Well even though there are some things in my life that I do fell still need fixing…as I said before, this decade did end on a much better note than it started on…and I can only hope that will carry over into 2010.  As for tonight…I won’t be running at midnight, I won’t be smooching anybody at midnight, but I will be ringing in the new year with friends…just fun and no drama…all I can ask for.

So…long story short, I’m happy to be leaving this devil of a decade behind and can only hope for bigger and better things in the next year…or next 10 years…or more.

Happy New Year everyone!  Have fun, be safe…and talk to ya “next year”!

maybe i’m getting too old for this

So since I’m sure everyone was dying to know (ha, not really) yes I did venture out on XMas Eve…guess it beat staying home and watching reruns of Jersey Shore   If you were hoping for any juicy gossip, I’m sorry to disappoint…no running into peeps I knew like the Ex-Boyfriend’s frat brother or anything like that   So, knowing in advance which venue attracted the “younger” and “older” ends of the spectrum, I decided to go to the one “inbetween.”  Which was actually a good move…not too crowded, DJ playing 80s music, open vodka bar for the first hour.  Only talked to 2 guys that nite…first didn’t seem too into me, got a playa vibe from the second.  I don’t know, I just feel like I’ve really outgrown this scene…unless I know everybody at the shindig (e.g., the Flyer parties…or hell, even NYRR’s club night) I’m not great in this setting…better one on one, methinks.  Plus nursing a killer hangover is not how I wanted to spend my XMas day.  Maybe I just needed one more of these things just to get out of my system, but I think I might skip it next XMas Eve…ask me again in a year though   But really, who meets the love of their life at one of these “meet markets”…

So besides that, not really much to tell.  Except what was supposed to be a quiet work week did have to be disrupted by crazy person doing his crazy person thing on a project I’m doing for him.  It’s always something with this one!!

choose my xmas eve adventure

Or non-adventure.

OK, poll in the sidebar.  Need help deciding what to do XMas Eve.  Do I dare make an appearance at the Matzo Ball and drop $25 (plus cost of overpriced drinks) to check out the annual Jewish singles meat market or not?  Last time I made an appearance was 2 years ago…and it was interesting to say the least. 

But seriously, in a way it just seems more pointless than the Kleinerman 10K was for the NYAC womens team (those of you in the local running scene know will know what I mean by that   not meant to be a shot at that team in any way tho!)…do I ever really have any luck at these things?  And do I need blog material that badly?  (ok maybe I do…)

So help me decide please

"on to the next"

And this latest post title has been brought to you by the latest episode of The Hills.  Is it me, or has this episode finally brought back the show we all hate to love, or love to hate?  How staged was K-Cav and Jayde’s catfight…I know there is only one club in LA and of course they will run into each other, especially when Kristin is with Brody, but still!  And I thought Audrina and Lo would “never be friends”…and now they are BFF’s?  And WHY, for the good of all humankind, could Spencer have just gone through with getting neutered???

I guess that title is just appropriate for lots going on lately.  Of course, the running stuff, but I’ll get to that later.  Earlier this week, I had to let go of a wonderful guy who has been very near and dear to me for the last few months-well this was kind of a mutual “letting go.”  (And he has never gotten a blog mention before…well at least not in the context of dating, so you know I was really into him and that it was going well! )  My heart said “stay” but my head knew what was the right thing to do, if we wanted to salvage any kind of a friendship…which I am optimistic about.  But it’s tough all the same-we really shared a lot…between running and outside of running.  He’d be the first person I’d call/text when something good happened…or even when something bad happened and I needed consoling, or just someone to talk to.  Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t overdependent, but there is that comfort in knowing someone is there.  Luckily, it did end on a good note and we are still speaking and not arguing…so I am hopeful!   So in this case “on to the next” is not so much the next guy, but more the next phase of our relationship…never know where it can take me/us.  And some of you…and you know who you are  …this does not give you free reign to immediately fix me up with your coworker/cousin/neighbor/random acquaintance/doorman/etc.   Just need time right now…and as Natasha Bedingfield says in her song “Single”-I can’t “romance on demand!”  (On that topic, has anyone ever checked out the lyrics to that song, and then to Natasha’s song “Soulmate”?  Talk about one singer having opposing points of view!  The latter is a beautiful song, but I swear I can’t listen to it without getting teary-eyed!)

And as for the running thing, I swear I really am trying to move “on to the next” as well!  Whatever that may be.  As I said in my previous post-I do have 2 races next year that I am tentatively penciling in as goal races (yes, one is a marathon but it won’t be til the fall though.)  Little hesitant to post what they are now, so wait and see.  I have my follow-up appointment with doctor #1 at the end of this month, so I’ll see if there is any positive progress made.  One thing I do want to explore, which was mentioned before, is new orthotics…my current ones are 5 years old and I wouldn’t be surprised if that was one of the culprits.  Unfortunately, I have different medical insurance now and I don’t believe they will be covered, so it would be pricier this time around…but if it’s something that will save my running future (and my previous ones did!) it’s a worthwhile investment…especially stretched out over a few years.

And keeping with “on to the next”…I’m thinking I might like to switch physical therapists too.  My current one is nice, don’t get me wrong, but…I’m feeling like there should be more progress by now, and I’d love to find one who is more familiar with runners.  I don’t know if I can do that without another prescription for PT from the doctor, but if is indeed what he prescribes, that may be the way to go.  So NYC-area runners-if you have any recommendations for me, I’d be very grateful to hear them!!  Only prerequisite is that they must take insurance

So there you have it-I am honestly dwelling less on the past and trying to look ahead.  But I do still feel I need a little help getting there…more with game plans than anything else!!

splitting the difference-sort of

Well I figured out a compromise to my December 31st/January 1st query in my last post. I figured whatever mileage I ran to warm up can count for 12/31, then the run itself can count for 1/1. There-a little something for each day.

Yes, it really was 18 degrees. No, it wasn’t as bad as it may have sounded. Just had to layer right (running skirt over tights is a great cold-weather idea!) and was grateful for the hats we got in the swag bag this year (makes up for the ugly green shirt.) Plus I ran to the start to warm up that way. Surprisingly, saw no Flyers around. I know both that I was tentatively supposed to meet up with for the run decided to bail due to the cold…but figured there would be others. (Or am I the only crazy vain person who has to worry about fitting into her clothes?) Thanks to my trusty wireless communication device, I found out there were a few en route from the east side, but as midnight got closer I was getting too cold just standing around, and wanted to get a decent starting position so I could start running as soon as possible.

So I wandered over to the start and squeezed in as close to the front as possible which actually wasnt so close. And small world-there was a guy who recognized me from last year’s Need for Speed-apparently we both were supposed to run leg 9 when we got the announcement that the race was canceled. (though surprised he recognized me-after all I had a lot of clothing on now and back then I had, uh, much less on.) Unfortunately, he was running with a girl-probably a girlfriend (of course this always happens to me.)

So blah blah blah, its midnight, happy new year, fireworks go off. Cross the start within 2 minutes. And even though I didn’t race this, I didn’t exactly take it easy either…the quicker I run, the quicker I finish. And that first mile included a bit of crowding too!! Didn’t even bother stopping for “champagne” at the 2-mile point, as I carried my own in my water bottle (would you expect anything less?) At the beginning of mile 4, I spotted Moz and shouted at him. I picked up the pace a little, wanting to be done and taking advantage of the downhill. And done I was, in 33 and change minutes. Sorta uneventful, but it was 4 miles in the books for 2009. Saw Moz and some of his TRD teammates near the finish, posed for a coupla pics, chatted for a few minutes and then I wanted to get home and get inside. So that’s how I started off 2009…not really with a bang.

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And now, some venting, if you don’t want to read-please press the back button immediately. If not, hey dont say I didn’t warn you.

I swear, what is it about New Year’s Eve that always seems to accentuate how lonely I am? The fact that once again, I had no one special in my life to share last night with, to kiss at midnight, to run with me last night…it just brought to mind that even though I did have running-related successes in 2008, I failed miserably at something more important-the boyfriend department. And the fact that I had to defend to my mom on the phone yesterday why I was still doing the run when it was cold out, why I didn’t get invited to any NYE parties, why I have to do things by myself…yeah, you can understand why I was crying by the time I got off the phone. Seriously, is it my fault that all my friends are in relationships and I’m left out in the cold? I’m sick of her and others saying “oh you never know, you’ll find someone…” I call BS on that. It’s easy to say that when you were married with 2 kids when you were my age-they don’t know what it’s like, how hard it is. I’m realistic, I know I don’t have too many good years left-and at this point, I only see a guy being interested in me if he isn’t looking to start a family-because at my age, I don’t know what my options are. And believe me, again, it’s not that I’m not trying…I guess all in all, I really feel like I’m “on the outs.” And I swore to myself years ago I wouldn’t let myself be in this situation again, feeling like the only single person…

Yeah I know, I ran a great marathon, I had a good running year, etc…but what did I ultimately sacrifice for that? And if I want to qualify for Boston this year…do I need to sacrifice that again? So confused…(or maybe I need to stop watching Sex and the City…)

some things never change

ya know, i haven’t had a jdate post in awhile…

so I have this picture on my profile. and yesterday, I was a recipient of a one-sentence email which said:

“what’s a nice jewish girl doing on santa’s lap? “

not even worth the effort to reply and say that said santa is actually jewish.

and while i am at it, why is it the only guys who either view my profile or contact me are either under 30, or in their late 40s or older, and/or do not live in the NYC area?

I swear, what part of “i am looking for a guy between x age and y age?” and “i am not willing to relocate” do these people NOT understand???

I viewed a guy’s profile yesterday that started with “OK – I put the age requirement in – but either it is disregarded or unread, so putting it as the first line in my profile.” Maybe he’s got the right idea…

man, i hate dating.

white sheets, flashing lights

Ah yes, a few months have gone by, I guess I was due to hit up another Jewish singles event. And there was one last nite, put on by the same people who put on this last one in March. This one had a swanky “White Party” theme…think Hamptons meets JDate :-p Seriously, I have never seen so much white clothing all in one place. And to keep with that, was held at a pretty swank locale too…Duvet-infamous for the seating being actual beds (and in a SATC episode too-anyone remember this episode when Carrie got broken up with on a Post-It? On a POST-IT?!?!?)

So yeah, me and NC had on cute little all-white dresses and were both hoping for the best. Though it was a cool scene…and the music was great, I had a lot of fun dancing quite a bit…unfortunately, no male prospects. (the ones that did talk to me…no potential. my favorite was the one who showed me that he has a NJ drivers license even though he’s never lived in NJ-and has it to cheat on his taxes. I mean…who tells someone this when they’re trying to make a first impression???)

I swear, am I a glutton for punishment or something? Like why do I still go to these things if I know that it’s tough to meet guys there? (meaning relationship-minded guys…no playas, no hook-up artists.) Don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret going, I did have fun…it’s just these events that are meant for one thing usually seem to have the opposite effect!!

Well…thank god for one thing…no sleazy guys were trying to get me to go to bed with them :-p
(ok i know that was bad!!)

is this really what it takes?

Well now that The Hills is on hiatus til August, that means I need to find some other show to occupy my time on Monday nights…and The Bachelorette has done that job. Last week’s premiere was quite entertaining…but I swear, the things these guys do to get attention have gotten more and more ridiculous…

• There was the martial-arts guy, who I guess thought it would be impressive to kick a lemon off the head of another bachelor…
• The guy who stripped down to his briefs to jump in the pool…oh yeah, the briefs had the girl’s name on the a$$
• The personal trainer who’s ‘roid problem was evident after he did not get a rose-after all, he should get picked because his body made him God’s gift to women, right?
• Not to mention gifts that ranged from necklaces to “crab cocktails” (the latter made by one of the bachelors who was a chef)

I guess you actually had to watch the show to really see what I mean…as I don’t think I do a good job describing (or actually, Entertainment Weekly does a better job here.)

But good lord…I know this is TV, I know this is “fantasy,” but guys…please do not get any ideas from this. You really don’t have to go this far to impress me (or most other girls, I’m sure!)

That being said, I didn’t know whether to feel sorry for the guy who botched the National Anthem during the Dodger Stadium date on last night’s episode…or think “come on-you should know this by now!”

like a fly you can’t swat

So as Purim is this week, this of course means a plethora of Jewish singles events. NC and I decided to go to one that was put on by the same group that put on the second event we went to here. We were both prepared for there to be lots of men doing lots of groping :-p

When we got inside, we both noted that the crowd seemed a little more tame than the previous event. Good, there may be hope. But of course, we can’t go to any of these events without seeing someone we knew, or met once!! One being the guy from the previous event that remembered my LV bag. And another…well this guy took my number at the previous event but never called (I was indifferent to that though)-and apparently he went out with NC once but pretended not to recognize her. And this time he was pretending to not recognize either of us. But man…the entire night, no matter where we were in the bar, he was nearby. As I said to NC “he’s like a fly you just can’t swat.”

No male prospects, unfortunately…but the music was good for dancing-thankfully no groping males! (Oh but there was the one who asked us if we had kissed any guys yet that night…oh jeez )Oh, and the party was costume optional…didn’t feel like going all-out in costume, but thought it’d be fun to wear a tiara…nothing wrong with being a queen for a day (or night!) But the funny thing was that someone on the subway earlier in the evening, and one later too…thought it was my birthday or something because I had the tiara. Hey-doesn’t have to be my birthday to channel my inner princess… :-p

the numbers game

with no prospects in the horizon, decided to tweak my JDate profile a little bit. we’ll see if anything happens with that, but related to that-and online dating-there was something on my mind…that I had also heard others talking about too…

Unlike most online dating profiles, JDate does have a spot where you can list your weight. I have always decided to plead the fifth on that. First off-it’s really no one’s business what my exact weight is (and can always change based on things like time of month, etc…)

But moreso…it seems like guys are so hung up on the numbers-they expect girls to be super skinny, won’t date someone above a certain weight or BMI…and honestly, considering I am probably 10-15 pounds heavier than what guys consider acceptable for my height (not due to laziness though-just bad genes)…I am sorta afraid that the number would be a turnoff. Instead, I hope the fact that I mention an active lifestyle (e.g., marathon running)-and that I have halfway decent pictures-would make up for that. Or does it?

Yeah I know. If a guy would judge me based on a number, I wouldn’t want to be with him anyway. But guys, please convince me you’re not all like that.

party of one

I had picked up this week’s “Singles Issue” of Time Out New York, and was intrigued by this article. It kinda conjured up memories of my San Francisco trip, where people seemed surprised that I was dining by myself. (I was there solo for the last coupla days of my trip…) Or when people said to me “you’re so brave” if I go to a bar or party solo, sans wing-people.

In a way, I don’t get what the big deal is. There are times when it’s nice to call the shots as to what you want to eat/drink…or if you meet someone, you don’t have to worry as much about abandoning a friend…hell, there have been a couple of times where I just wanted to go sit at the bar, have a drink to toast myself/chase off an uncomfortable happy hour/just for the hell of it. And it’s nice during the spring/summer to sit outside at a wine bar, sip a glass and read a magazine/people-watch. And what I have heard before, is that guys are more likely to approach a girl who’s solo than try and infiltrate a group of girls.

But on the flip side…I do feel a little self-conscious, like they’re all thinking “she’s here solo, what’s wrong with her.” (Never mind that they probably don’t know that I just didn’t feel like staying at home because everyone else was either with spending time with significant others/out on “date night”/just not feeling a night out/don’t like the suggested scene or venue.)

Maybe I’m making too big a deal of this, but I thought this was good blog material And would be interested to hear other thoughts!!

400 down and ? more to go

Dammit, this has been my 400th post since September 2005. Man, do I need a life. :-p

I can’t even think of something “milestone-ish” to write about, so I will just write about random stuff.

Not much has happened since the awards gala…historically, I think February has been sort of a “let-down” month for me…December is packed with holiday madness, which does follow into January as well…making January a packed and festive month too. But February…not much on the social calendar, it’s still winter…oh and let’s not forget the fact that Valendoomsday is coming up next week. Blah. How can I forget, when every single store has V-day candy and/or cards shoved in your face ever since before Christmas? Not fair, singles deserve equal representation. As Carrie Bradshaw said once on Sex and the City: “… Hallmark doesn’t make a ‘congratulations, you didn’t marry the wrong guy’ card.” I do intend to wear black that day (and maybe something else will too)…of course if I am lucky, it will be another snow day and I can work from home and not have to go outside at all.

Not bored with cross-training yet, but a part of me wishes I was outside in this unseasonably warm weather. Up to a little over 2 miles and may brave the reservoir later this week. Hoping to be up to 4 miles in time for the Snowflake 4-miler…even if I don’t race it, as it’s a points race. Got 2 1/2 weeks, I think I can do it…

different, but the same

well this was interesting. this past weekend, me and my Flyer teammate NC decided to take on a duo of Jewish singles parties…each one with a decidedly different vibe to it.

The first one on Saturday night, was held at an Equinox gym in midtown…the premise was to get fitness-minded Jewish singles together. And no cover for women, so hey, why not? And honestly-I think it was a good idea in theory. But I think the end result was kinda underwhelming. First off-the only hooch there was wine samples. (Good thing I already had a mojito and a glass of white wine at dinner.) At least it was free, but hey…you need more alcohol to induce mingling!! I’m sure people would even pay for it. Second, the only food available to guests was fruit. Obviously the organizers have never spent much time around runners. And not surprisingly-the crowd was mostly female (well duh…of course, thanks to the free cover!) and the males there…kinda meh. (And of course, I ran into someone I know-a male friend of my friend’s sister who i met at the Matzo Ball. There-my “jewish singles are a small world” moment of the night.) Our favorite was the one guy who kept trying to convince us we were drunk and slurring our words. Who knows, maybe he was on to something…after all, we excused ourselves from uncomfortable conversations quite a few times that nite to sample yet another type of wine, til we sampled them all and by then it was time to call it a night.

And we tried again on Sunday night…this event was one that apparently attracted a more “Euro” Jewish crowd, and was held at a nice bar in midtown. The music was great, the dancing was fun. But the men…oh. mah. gawd. Quite a few of them were pretty aggressive-this was like some of my better JDate emails come to life. (oh, and of course we had a “jewish singles are a small world” moment of the night-we did recognize a couple of guys from the night before…one even remembered my LV bag.) NC and I had to rescue each other quite a bit by either hitting the bar or just going elsewhere til we both had enough!! I think the best thing that we got out of the night was free chocolate :-p

Well, at least we went into these without expectations…all in all I was fine with what it was…and what it usually is-a good time with friends, with stories to tell afterwards!

an unlikely turn of events

Friday was my last day of work for 2007, and also the last Flyers TGIFF happy hour of 2007. Should have been a great night, but that is not exactly how things panned out.

Well it didn’t start off so bad, actually. But for reasons that I really don’t want to go into here, I had to make an early exit. I got back uptown but really didn’t feel like going home…was too…i dunno. i felt like being by myself, but didn’t want to go back to my place. so i decided i’d find a place where i could just sit at the bar and sip a drink and just calm my nerves. the first 2 places i thought of looked too crowded, but the 3rd had enough room for me to sit at the bar and sip a mojito.

I left after a drink, and as I was walking towards the corner, I made eye contact with a very cute guy and vice versa…he finished up his cell phone conversation and walked over…said i looked familiar and asked what my name was…and wouldn’t you know it, we did meet randomly once before…once over the summer, when i was on the crosstown bus en route to Skylight’s b-day shindig. I let this connection get away back then (since there was someone else in the picture), but let’s just say I didn’t make the same mistake twice…so we will see what happens! I mean…what are the chances of a missed connection being found again?

so i guess this crazy night had a decent ending

jewish singles=smallest community ever-part 2 of …

ohhh yeah…i knew it’d happen again.

so i’m sure you can guess from the title that I did wind up attending The Ball on XMas Eve. I was there solo in the beginning, but then met up with my coworker and her BF and a couple other of their friends and had a good time. I still can’t believe how many Jewish singles there are in the tri-state area…this event took place in 5 bars, and everywhere was just packed. ( I wound up going to 3 of the 5…The Park was pretty quiet in the beginning but at least it was easy to get a drink, Hiro (the lounge/club at the Maritime Hotel) was abolutely packed but was playing good music…The Cabanas (the rooftop bar at the Maritime) was packed but a little less so…then went back to The Park, where it had really picked up by that time.)

But enough of that. I’m sure you can tell there is a story brewing here, and that is what you really want to hear!

So as I know I have mentioned in the past, I can’t go to these events without running into someone I know. And actually, later in the evening, I run into one of my ex-collegues from my last job…actually, I think last time I saw him was one of these events a coupla years back. But that’s not the real interesting story…

Early in the evening, I catch the eye of a tall, good-looking guy. I walk over and we start talking. He tells me his name, and where he’s from and I’m thinking “hmmm…I did know someone by that same name from that same place.” When he mentioned where he went to school-same school as me-I put 2 and 2 together and knew that I knew him. When I asked if he was in a fraternity and he said what i thought he was gonna say…I let on that we did already know each other.

Basically-I was chatting with the Ex-Boyfriend’s fraternity “big” brother!! OMG…talk about random encounters!!

But we actually had a nice conversation, catching up and stuff…he seemed to understand why I hadn’t talked to the Ex in 7 years…that I did what I had to do to move on with my life. I then had to leave to go to one of the other bars, but got digits…and told him to tell the Ex that i said hi.

Please tell me that last action will result in some good karma for me.

heat training

10 miles yesterday afternoon in 85-degree heat.

5 miles late this morning in killer humidity.

just kept thinking “that which cannot kill you can only make you stronger.”

and you know what…that thinking just may have worked. in addition to stopping at as many water fountains as possible. it really didn’t feel as bad as a week ago…maybe this heat training is working…we’ll see for sure on Saturday.

other mentions from the weekend…Friday was the Flyers‘ TGIFF at the Boat Basin…and I think I spotted the guy I saw there last week again. date last nite (dinner and a coupla glasses of wine at a wine bar)…good time, not sure if there is gonna be a second. (actually just the fact that it got a blog mention probably means I don’t forsee a second :-p )

oh…and i am making tenative vacay plans for the end of July, and it is gonna include running!! I’ve already put in for the time off, only thing that is preventing me from making definite plans is that I am still in rent negotiations for next year…so there is the possibility I may have to put these vacation plans on hold if I need to apartment-hunt…but hopefully I find out the answer to that this week…

now playing “wicked lil grrrls” ~ esthero

jewish singles=smallest community ever

well in addition to other strange occurances this weekend…these 2 sorta take the cake, like right out of a reality TV show or something.

first off, Boat Basin Friday nite. I see 2 guys and go over to talk to them. (OK, the 2 strawberry margaritas helped my nerve a little bit.) And one of those guys said I looked familiar…and we did figure out where we knew each other from…

Remember this guy?

Then, last nite’s Jewish singles thingie. It’s crowded as usual…oh, and wouldn’t you know it, it’s pouring when I get out of the subway and I had no umbrella-but improvised with an issue of AM New York. So I go to the bar and am chatting with a guy…and as we kept talking…I realized that we did meet once, and where I knew him from…

Remember this guy?

Funny thing is-he didn’t seem to remember me!! And mind you, my first name isn’t very common… (I didn’t say anything to him though, hinting that we did go out once…)

But the night did have a good ending (not with that guy though.) I’ll keep it mysterious.

And here’s a pic of me and Runner26 at the Boat Basin on Friday, drinks in hand of course :-p I almost forgot how potent those strawberry margaritas are…